Why Did Syd Sixx Leave Porn?

*Note: this is a story about sexual assault

I originally wasn't going to say anything, because of how painful the situation is. I didn't want to speak out at all at first because of the social pressure not to speak up on these type of things.

In February of 2024 I was vaginally raped by a trans woman. She was homeless, I opened my home to her out of trans solidarity, and she raped me in my own bed.

After she violated my body I couldn't have sex or even touch myself for about 4 months. I made the decision to leave the porn industry because it was too painful to keep going. Even with my own intimate partners in my personal sex life I began to have panic attacks when touched.

Not only was the sexual assault damaging to my 6-year-long career as an adult performer, it ruined my sense of self. I was so dysphoric and suicidal. My entire world, everything I knew, was ripped away from me.

When I had mentioned being raped by a trans woman, I was met with multiple dogpiles telling me to detransiton, death threats, and other harassment. I tried to be very clear that I do not view all trans women as rapists, but they attacked me viscously anyways. I spiralled into a deep depression.

I left the porn industry behind because I couldn't force myself to keep going. And honestly? It was the best decision I have ever made for myself. For the first time in my life I am developing a healthy relationship to sex and a healthy relationship with my body. My dysphoria has also improved since leaving modelling behind. The porn industry was keeping me in a cycle of psychological abuse. Studies show that being a sex worker is more traumatic than being a EMT, being an ER nurse during covid, and even worse for the mind than being a troop who saw combat. It's no longer worth it to be to let myself be sexually abused for money. I can look back fondly on some of my performances. but overall... the sex industry is nothing but abuse, rape, and death. I watched it chew up and spit out so many trans people. I've watched the industry push young trans people to suicide attempts. I can't ever go back. I don't hate sex workers, I hate the sex industry.

Side note: yes I'm still upset about the how toxic the trans community is to survivors of rape by a trans woman. There is a SERIOUS issue of intracommunity sexual violence that we cannot even address without being called a transphobe and told to detrans or to unalive myself. You should be ashamed about the way you treat survivors in your own community.

~ Frankie

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